here I was standing out in the freezing weather in line at Poor Richard’s Saturday night. Oh, the memories of my freshman year in college, when it was nothing to do such a thing.
At the time the popular spot was called Pretzels. If you think PR’s is small – Pretzel’s was smaller, but with a bigger dance floor.
But times have changed, and so have the spots to go clubbin’, if that is the proper terminology for it. Pretzel’s gave way to the establishment now refered to as The Planet. Then The Planet faze died with the rise of the almighty Downtown Rafters.
Personally I am a fan of neither of the places, but I do frequent Poor Richards and Gatsby’s.
Regardless, my story begins with the line outside PR’s.
Why does PR’s have that line anyway? Well, it has to do with regulations that stem down from the fire marshal’s office.
PR’s has the capacity to hold only about 300-350 people at one time within regulations of the fire hazard occupancy code.
I was thinking that PR’s had instituted a “if the bouncer likes you, you get in” policy. But I was wrong to think so.
I then thought that the managerial staff was looking out for the comfort level inside the establishment, since it has become a common thing for some patrons to get up close and personal with everyone and the furniture, resulting in the following conversation:
“Hi, I’m barstool, do you come here often? I’ve never seen you here before.”
“Sorry, I don’t do barstools. I’m here for the beer.”
Regardless, there was a line and there was nothing we good patrons could do.
Which lets me dwell on the next topic. The wait. Usually, there is about a 30-minute wait to get into PR’s.
So until a reasonable number leave, the rest have to wait outside to get in. Not so bad.
Well, it wouldn’t be so bad, but some people have a tendency to be very impatient when it comes to getting inside.
I recall about 10 people who were behind me getting in 10 minutes before I got in.
Now, I know that sounds like I’m ranting because I didn’t muscle my way to the front, but well, I am OK.
What was the point in doing that? Will skipping a few people in line make your entrance that much better?
If it does, let me know, I’ll try it.
Or rather, I won’t, because I have what we call respect for other people.
I recognize that the people in front of me have been waiting longer than I have. They have the right to enter before me.
I know I would be ticked, and am ticked, that some would skip in front of me, to do that very thing – Mr. “I’m gonna pull some leverage in this line.”
Or Mr. “I’m too retarded to put on a coat so I’ll squeeze my manly body into my girlfriend’s sweater.”
After several attempts of the skippers trying to get in, they tried to rouse up the crowd standing in line like good little sheep. “Come on, everybody lean in, they can’t hold us out.”
Then the chanting started when a group of people made it inside and they were the ones still left in the cold with everyone else.
Then people began screaming obscene slurs to the bouncers and the bar, screaming at each other to hold the door open and other things the paper can’t print.
The fact was, everyone got to go inside well before the bar closed.
Twenty minutes after I got in, the rest of the line outside was being let in, too.
To help with the impatient kind out there, just a word of advice.
If you can’t stand the cold, go to The Planet.

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