Do any of you know who Edward Abbey was?
You should. Unfortunately, in our society, people make rash decisions based, not on their own knowledge, but on a two-minute blurb they saw on 60 Minutes.
Therefore, the few times that I have heard conversations about Abbey, people say one of two things: “He was a womanizer” (which he was) or “He was a mental case” (which was also probably true).
Yet, people view these things in the wrong light.
First, let me introduce you to Edward Abbey.
Abbey is one of the three authors (Thoreau, Emerson, Abbey), whose books can be found in both the classics and nature section of your local bookstore.
Yes, for those of you who are very proud of the fact that you have not completed a single book, “book learnin” stores carry things other than Tocqueville’s “Democracy in America.”
Edward Abbey was an environmentalist, but not really. Abbey’s sense and care for the environment spawned mostly from his cowboy-ish nature. He reveled in wide-open spaces that were not tainted by industrial complexes or RV campgrounds.
Abbey would probably be considered an independent in our political culture, because his views fell both ways.
Although, upon hearing that, he would have most certainly beat me into the ground. For the most part, Edward Abbey despised the government.
He believed that “hierarchal institutions are like giant bulldozers . obedient to the whim of any fool who takes the controls,” and being deemed or assigned to a certain political group would have welcomed a butt-whipping my way.
Throughout his life, Abbey remained a cynic of, not only the world around him, but of himself. In the most simplistic form, Abbey believed in guns, the environment, women, and tobacco.
Yet, he cared nothing for psychobabble or the ideals of a philosophy based upon the true meaning of reality.
He said, “It may be true that my desk here is really `nothing but’ a transient eddy of electrons in the flux of universal process.
“Nevertheless, I find that it continues to support my feet, my revolver and my cigars all day long. What happens when my back is turned I don’t know. Or much care. That’s no concern of mine.”
One thing remained free from Abbey’s ridicule throughout the facets of his mind . the environment.
Nothing else was sacred or safe from his scorching wit. Abbey often criticized Thoreau for being nothing more than Emerson’s stable boy (which was actually true). When Emerson went on his European lecture tours, Thoreau would come and do any work that needed to be done around his house, and this gave Abbey an irresistible supply of ammunition.
Anyway, Abbey’s books are among the best I have read. They combine a cynical humor with the real-life problems that just seem to be ignored by a “progressive minded” culture. Take a night off from television and enlighten yourself.
Abbey is an amazing writer who is truly a pleasure to read.
Wait, I feel like I am in a blurb from Reading Rainbow.
Well, regardless, if any of you kids want to read a good book about environmental warriors who burn down roadside billboards, drive land-movers into rivers, run from the police and count distance by the amount of beers it takes to get there, The Monkey Wrench Gang by Edward Abbey is for you.
And for all the rest of you, go drink a beer, watch Friends and forget you ever read this.

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