W. LOCUST ST. – Scientists from the American Institute of Social Examination (AISE) have recently published a study in the prestigious research journal Science which sheds new light on loneliness and feelings of social isolation.
According to the new study, which followed 1,283 subjects over a five-year period, heavy tobacco use and the daily viewing of hardcore pornography on the Internet significantly reduced feelings of isolation and loneliness in 44 percent of the subjects.
Among the elderly, studies have consistently shown that disconnecting the telephone, avoiding the outdoors and getting rid of pets, which psychologists have deemed “distracting,” radically improves the overall moods of test-subjects over the age of 60.
“The results of this experiment seem to indicate that if you know someone who is really reaching out for the companionship of another person, the best thing to do is leave them be. Give them the space and privacy that they need to work through these feelings,” said Dr. Jack Freon, director of research at the American Institute.
Increased alcohol consumption, when coupled with a healthy obsession with unpaid bills and financial problems, appeared to “put a spring in their step and laughter in their hearts,” the report concluded. In addition, researchers from the AISE also found that nocturnalism, “heavy-fretting,” and the practice of making long lists of negative traits “really seems to bring lonely people out of their shells.

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