The first thing that I learned in college is that who you were in high school does not define who you are for the rest of your life. In high school I was overweight, anti-social and unhappy. I was dealing with the death of my mother and trying to navigate a world in which she didn’t exist. I shut myself off from my peers and refused to be involved in school activities.

During my junior and senior years, I managed to forge a few friendships, got involved in the school television show and even took one of the leads in the senior play.

Still, I went through high school thinking that my life was decided. I was sure that I would forever be the chubby girl that didn’t know how to socialize. A few years later, I know now what I wish I had known then: High school doesn’t define you. You can be whoever you want to be. You can change.

I lost the weight. I have the most attractive, kind and successful boyfriend out of everyone I know. I’ve got a fantastic resume and I’m a year away from graduating with my bachelor’s degree and starting my career in journalism. I have amazing friends and I love meeting new people.

If you had told me four years ago that this is the person that I would become, I wouldn’t have believed you.

Over the past few weeks I’ve had the opportunity to spend some time with people from high school.

Some of the most popular girls are struggling with post-pregnancy weight and cheating husbands and boyfriends. They’re living with their parents, still unsure of what exactly they’re going to do.

While they’re struggling, my fellow awkward high school acquintances have been losing weight, falling in love and thriving in college.

The people that probably judged me in high school are now friend requesting me on Facebook and commenting on my daily updates.

Previously skinny girls who gained weight after high school are messaging me begging me for weight loss advice.

The popular girls whose boyfriends have treated them horribly since high school are constantly telling me how jealous they are of my National Guardsman who loves me more than I could ever hope for someone to.

I’m not sure why we think that we have life figured out in high school. Everyone I knew in high school has changed, either for better or for worse.

I wish that I knew then what I know now. That overweight, socially awkward girl found a way to fall in love. She found a way to lose the weight and even somehow managed to deal with her mother’s death along the way.

When I see people from high school now and they tell me how gorgeous and thin I am, I smile and say thank you, but I don’t make a big deal out of it. I know that some day, I might not be this gorgeous and thin. I learned not to judge people for their looks or their personalities because of the first thing that I learned in college: People change.

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