People are like chocolate chip cookies, according to relationship expert Elizabeth George.George, an ETSU graduate, discussed what “essence qualities” are and how to use them to exceed in life during a presentation Tuesday night in the university’s Culp Auditorium.

“The idea of essence qualities is like our ingredients of who we are,” George said. “We all have a list of ingredients that make us unique . kind of like the perfect chocolate chip cookie.”

There are four guidelines for determining essence qualities. One step is to find out what qualities are most important to ourselves and keep them.

“If you relinquish them, you are no longer yourself,” George said, in a serious tone. “Don’t settle. Know yourself so you can know others on a higher level.”

Bonnie Rogers, who graduated from ETSU in 1985 and is a longtime friend of George, has used her essence qualities to excel in relationships.

“I was in a bad marriage and tried to fix it for 14 years,” Rogers said.

“Elizabeth taught me how to figure out my essence qualities. Now I know who I am and that is the most important thing of all.”

George encourages people to figure out what qualities make each individual unique and use those qualities to attract like-minded people, whether it is an intimate, friendship or business relationship.

“The better you know yourself, the better you are to articulate yourself,” George said. “Essence qualities define you very specifically.”

Speaking with college students is important because most are beginning to figure out what their strengths and weaknesses are, she said.

“I enjoyed learning how to figure out who I am,” Kayla Cutshall, a health science major, said. “If you don’t know yourself, then you can’t truly know others.”

George’s goal is to help people understand whether to take a step forward or back in different relationships.

“I normally hang out with people that do not have the same qualities as myself,” freshman Cody Morelock said. “I am more aware of the type of people I need to find to hang out with.”

George and her husband, Darren, have recently published a book titled, “The Compatibility Code, An Intelligent Woman’s Guide to Dating and Marriage,” found at her website www.yourprefex.com. The book covers tips on how to have a happy and successful marriage.

“When you first meet somebody, you have about two or three seconds to make an assessment,” George said. “That’s huge.

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