Dear Sex Matters,My girlfriend and I have recently decided that we will use condoms for contraceptive purposes. When we went to the store, there were so many choices that we didn’t know what to buy! Can you explain the different types of condoms and their various uses, advantages, disadvantages, effectiveness, etc.? We are monogamous and just wanting to be as safe as possible with each other.

Thanks,

Condom Confusion

Dear Condom Confusion,

Just about everybody buys condoms at some point, and just about everybody gets embarrassed, confused or frustrated by the experience. So let’s talk condoms and clear up some of the confusion.

To buy condoms:

Know why you’re using a condom in the first place.

While it’s easy to make condoms a fun part of your sex life, you’ve got to be clear that on a very basic level, condom use is about more than having a good time.

Condom use is about helping to protect ourselves and our partners from unwanted pregnancies and potentially fatal or life-altering sexually transmitted diseases (STDs).

If you’re working from that understanding, once you know you’ve got condoms nearby, you’ll be free to enjoy safe sex however you like.

Know the pros and cons of using a condom. The pros of using a condom during sex (be it vaginal, anal or oral) are pretty straightforward.

*Condoms help prevent pregnancy and STD’s.

*Condoms are inexpensive, lightweight, disposable, and available nearly everywhere.

*Condoms can help men stay erect longer and are likely to reduce premature ejaculation.

*Condoms can be used virtually with any other method of birth control.

The points against condoms are probably pretty familiar because they are the main hurdles that prevent people from using them.

Many men and women say that condoms dull sensation.

Some men and women find that they lose some of their sexual excitement when dealing with condoms, be it from frustration or feeling self-conscious.

Most of these reasons are psychological, which doesn’t make them any less real, but does make them easier to deal with.

Being genuinely comfortable with your partner, not taking sex or yourself too seriously, and lots of practice go a long way to reducing the downsides of using condoms.

Pick a type of condom. Condoms come in 5 basic types:

1. Latex: kind of rubber; the most common, least expensive; great at preventing STDs and pregnancy;

2. Polyurethane: kind of plastic; good for those with latex allergies; not as elastic as latex, so they may slip off; thinner and stronger than latex; transfer heat more efficiently, which some say increases pleasure; prevents STDs and pregnancy.

3. Polyisoprene (SKYN): newest condom option on the market, made from natural rubber. Good for those with latex and polyurethane allergies; some claim they are more comfortable and form fitting than latex; prevents STDs and pregnancy.

4. Lambskin: good for preventing pregnancy but not STDs – small pores allow viruses and bacteria to pass through.

5. Female Condom: made from polyurethane; a sheath that is inserted into a woman’s vagina up to eight hours before intercourse (note: female condoms should not be used together with male condom). Prevents pregnancy and STDs.

Avoid condoms with spermicide. Some condoms come coated with nonoxynol -9 (N9), but the slight amount is inadequate in protecting against pregnancy.

Additionally, N9 can irritate skin and cause breakout, and some research has shown that N9 may actually facilitate HIV transmission.

Size. Too small, condom is uncomfortable. Too big, condom may slip off. Condoms are extremely stretchy, so really, the second problem is far more frequent.

Expiration date. Make sure the condom is within expiration and package is free of any punctures.

If condom has been overheated (stored in car, for example), it may not be safe to use.

Lubrication. Always use a water-based lubricant with a condom (KY, astroglide).

Oil based (ie Vaseline) may damage the integrity of the condom.

Other features are all about personal preference and fun – lubricated, nonlubricated, glow-in-the-dark, flavored, studded, shaped, colored, etc.

The safest route in avoiding an unexpected pregnancy (other than abstinence, of course) is to use a combination of hormonal birth control and a condom.

When using a condom alone, correct and consistent use will maximize their intended efficacy.

Take the time to Google how to use a condom properly, experiment with what works best for both of you, and have fun trying them out!

Sex Matters is a weekly column that addresses student questions about sexuality and relationships.

It provides readers with reliable, accessible information and a range of thoughtful perspectives so that students can make personal and responsible decisions concerning their health and well-being.

Students are encouraged to email their questions to oasis@etsu.edu.

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