I am the middle child of seven children, three boys and four girls. Some of my most vivid childhood memories are of my father drinking beer and smelling like alcohol.
Since 1985, my father has been a recovering alcoholic. However, I feel his addictive behavior was passed down to my brothers. Currently, all of my brothers are battling with alcoholism and drug addition.
There are so many things I have had to sacrifice personally because of alcohol.
For example, I could not attend my high school graduation because my older brother had been arrested.
At the hearing, the judge told us if we were willing to move out of the state he would dismiss the charges. So my parents decided that was the best option to avoid a prison term.
We moved three weeks before my graduation and I was unable to share that special moment with my friends and family.
When I graduated from a local community college, once again my older brother was in jail. He had been arrested for driving under the influence.
My parents planned a celebration for me but decided to cancel it because they were too upset to host a party. I was very angry with my brother and hurt, but I never told anyone how disappointed I was.
When my son was born, another brother was on trial for a series of alcohol-related offenses. None of my family could be present for the birth because they were testifying at his hearing.
During the birth of my daughter, my parents were 600 miles away visiting the same brother in prison. Even then, I remained silent.
In June 1998, I lost one brother to alcohol. Not the way one might think, because he did not die. Rather, he was severely injured.
After a night of drinking, he assaulted his wife and was subsequently arrested.
While housed in a local detention center, he suffered a massive head injury. He was transported to the hospital and the doctors had to remove a large portion of his brain to save his life.
As a result, he is severely mentally handicapped. He is unable to live on his own and will always depend on others to take care of him.
Our lives and that of my brother’s have been altered forever.
My parents have spent most of their savings trying to get my brothers help and to keep them out of trouble.
They have spent thousands of dollars hiring attorneys to represent my brothers for alcohol-related offenses, and pay for rehabilitation programs. However, none of their efforts have been to any avail.
Like my parents, I too have spent a great deal of time and money trying to help my brothers.
I have been burdened financially, but more importantly, I have been burdened emotionally.
I love my brothers and wish that I could save them from alcohol, but the bottom line is, I can’t.