What does 2003 have in store for us? Some people worry about raising their GPA’s from the depths of last semester. Others are merely waiting for the inspiration that will define them.
So while we bend and twist our imaginations around the coming months, it is nice to know there is a time (9 p.m. Monday) and place (Fox) where the mind can retreat when our fingers are tired of turning book pages. We are tuning in to see Evan Wallace make TV history.
Evan, who is better known to viewers as Joe Millionaire, has come to save us from the reality show nightmare we’ve all endured since the birth of Survivor several years ago.
On the surface Evan’s story isn’t a complicated one. He’s a 28-year-old bachelor from Virginia, looking for the woman of his dreams. Who could possibly begrudge him? Twenty unsuspecting women, that’s who! Twenty women who think they’re vying for the affection of a multi-millionaire.
All 20 think Evan, having inherited a fortune from a distant relative, has decided network television is the best place to find true love. Ha! Joke’s on them. Evan is a regular … well, Joe. He makes $19,000 dollars a year driving a bulldozer. But only everyone in America knows that. Shhh!
Each week Evan will eliminate a few women from the show. The others can hope to hang around a while longer if they’re worthy, but what Evan is looking for in the women and what they are looking for in him are two different things. Fox has told all these women that Evan is worth $50 million. And in all fairness to the great guy Evan might be, it’s hard to watch the show without thinking about all the little dollar sign oil lamps lighting up in the potential brides. However, there does appear to be a few women who are genuinely interested in Evan because he’s a nice guy.
The first episode saw eight contestants eat dirt when Evan banished them from the chateau he invited them to stay in. He then gave a pearl necklace to each of the 12 women who will live to see another week. The value of the jewelry he gives away each week will increase as the party starts slimming down to one gold medal marriage proposal.
Jewels are better than nothing for the women leaving Europe without Evan; at least they can pawn their memories of him back in the United States.
The first episode commanded 18.6 million viewers. The confusing part is, most of Joe’s audience (according to USA Today) was comprised of young females! Huh? Women who like watching other women being lied to?
Fox has outdone itself this time. They have finally developed a formula that can’t be repeated by any other network. Who in the world would fall for a trick like this again after all the publicity? How nice it is that the fall TV lineup won’t include Joe Millionaire: Cambodia. Or will it?
If Fox executives had any idea about the ratings success the show would have, then they are already halfway through shooting another one; this time with a lunch-lady and 40 men. It could be happening right now. Ooh! Wouldn’t that be great?
Hell, no one would know if they were. While taping Joe, only a handful of top executives at Fox knew what was going on. Not even the camera crew knew! The network gave the project a phony name to throw Hollywood snoops off the scent and even taped the damn thing out of the country on the chance somebody in America would spoil the surprise! Now that’s paranoia.
And in the end, does anyone care which woman wins Evan’s heart? No. That isn’t the surprise. The surprise is that we in TV land want to be there to see it.

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