I woke up this morning with a
hangover.
After hitting “snooze” four or
five times, I shaded my eyes from
the piercing sunbeams coming
through my window and dragged
myself out of bed. I pulled back
my hair, brushed my teeth, slid
on some sneakers and headed to
class in my pajamas.
Ah, a day in the life of a college
student.
Some of you may read this and
wonder why I live my life this
way. You are probably shaking
your heads in disapproval, wondering
why I go out drinking as
much as I do.
Let it be known that I respect
your opinions.
Those of you who don’t know
the local bartenders on a firstname
basis will never understand
why the rest of us do.
Unfortunately, the majority of
you are sympathetically nodding
your heads right now because you
woke up this morning feeling the
exact same way I did.
Now our job is to defend these
actions to the rest of the readers.
Society tends to look down on us
for our unique socialization
attempts. But why?
Analyzing this from our point
of view, going out every night is
the only logical answer.
Many of us work in the restaurant
business. The hours are not
excruciating and, if you do your
job well, the pay can be really
good.
But of course, there is a downfall.
There is something about
waiting tables and tending bars
that just makes you want to
drink.
Five solid hours of kissing your
customers’ butts makes that
after-work beer look more and
more appealing. It becomes an
excruciating torture to serve alcoholic
beverages one after the
other and not be able to enjoy
one yourself.
By the end of the night, you
and your closest co-workers
begin counting the minutes until
you can skip out to the closest bar
and have someone else tend to
your every need.
What’s so wrong with that?
What is more satisfying after a
long night of work than to slouch
down in a familiar bar stool and
enjoy a nice cocktail?
I know I am not alone when I
say that I can’t think of very many
answers to that question. How do
I know this?
Nearly every customer I wait
on can be spotted at the same bar
my co-workers and I attend.
“Did we tip you OK last
night?”
“Weren’t you at so-and-so last
Saturday?”
If we judge what is right and
wrong by social norms, then the
wrong people in this situation are
the ones who don’t go out drinking
all the time.
If you have a problem with this
logic, I want to propose a challenge
for you: give us something
else to do that is just as relaxing
and socially gratifying.
Johnson City is lacking in the
college-aged entertainment
department.
Granted, we have two movie
theaters, a mall and a roller skating
rink, but when it comes down
to it, what is there to do in this
city? I mean, besides go out to the
local bars and restaurants.
Most of our apartments, dorm
rooms and houses are so small
that we don’t have room to entertain
more than two or three
guests.
Maybe if we had somewhere to
go that allowed us quality social
time with our friends and didn’t
serve alcohol then we would
actually go there.
The problem is we don’t.
So until someone gives us
another option, I’ll keep coming
to class in my pajamas smelling
like last night’s alcohol.
Either someone will present
an alternative or they will finally
understand my reasoning.

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