Are you hungry?
I bet you are. I bet you’re practically starving to death. There’s no shame in it.
You’re probably a college student. That virtually gives you the right to be hungry. “Hungry” is the stalwart companion of “poor” and both are the sworn enemies of the college student.
Hence the dilemma: You want to eat but you can’t. You’re too poor. Another four-star meal of crackers and water tonight, eh?
Have you ever considered gardening? That grungy little “herb garden” you hide in your bathtub under a UV lamp doesn’t count – I’m talking about a cheap, efficient and legal way of obtaining nourishment.
On Nov. 17, Dr. Richard Moyer came to ETSU to present “Edible Landscapes: Trees and Shrubs for Food, Foliage and Flowers.” This event was sponsored by the ETSU Arboretum as a part of the “Trees of Tomorrow” program.
Apparently, these “Trees of Tomorrow” folks are big fans of oxygen, since they’re responsible for the planting of over 150 new species of trees in this area over the past two years. “Edible Landscapes” is just one of their many activities.
Anyway, Moyer, a professor of biology at King College, came to ETSU to encourage gardening for various reasons, the most important being the “exploration of your senses.”
Gardening, he explained, is much more than a visual exercise. Plants have much more to offer. Taste, touch, scent – all of these senses can be rewarded by an aptly maintained garden.
He went on to tell us that if we garden diversely, we could have fruit every day of the year. Juneberries, mulberries, clove currant, pawpaw, raspberries, blackberries, blueberries, passion fruit, maypop, goumi, jujube, kiwi, melonberries, quince, persimmons, figs, Cornelian cherries and more – all of these are at the very tips of our fingers.
Can you imagine, friend, a world where no college student goes hungry?
A magical place full of squirrels and berries, where everyone eats to their fill for only the slightest margin of cost? If this is not heaven, then it must be something like it.
What do you need to get started? Why, only a moderate plot of land and a number of hardy workers. But even that may not be enough.
Moyer offered these helpful tips:
Try new plants. Can’t pronounce the name of your newest shrub? Don’t worry about it. Just put that sucker in the ground and provide it with ample amounts water, pruning, netting and sunlight. You never know what you’ll get until you taste it and it doesn’t kill you. Be brave.
Feel free to fail. At the present time, there are no laws against the willful murder of plants. A successful gardener is probably going to kill more plants than all of the world’s “plant-digging dogs” combined. If you plant a tree or shrub and it dies, do the humane thing: keep killing them until you get it right.
Encourage simplicity. Finally, Moyer wanted all of us to realize that simpler lives are possible. “Fresh” doesn’t mean “fresh from the store.” Eat fruit right off of the branch.
Many are concerned about oil in Iraq and drilling in the Arctic Wildlife Refuge, but if everyone grew their own food, then how much petroleum would be conserved in food shipment? Quite a bit, I would imagine.
Moyer stressed that this is but one problem that could be alleviated by the living of simpler lives.
OK, I’ve got you excited now, eh? You’re ready to start shoveling manure and end world hunger, right?
Well, hold on, there’s small problem. I contacted Housing and Residence Life and unfortunately, they do not encourage the “digging up of the residence halls’ yards.” Those gardens you’ve got hidden away in your bathtubs are against the policy too.
Gosh. What is a starving college student to do?
I have no idea. Perhaps dropping out of college and living the happy life of a sharecropper is the answer.
Then again, I doubt that’s what Moyer had in mind. Simply realize that fruit comes from trees and shrubs, and if given the chance, you too could grow your own sustenance.
Truly, millions of people everywhere are feasting on the fruits of their tireless labor, while you sit shivering with your roommate, nibbling on stale crackers and rationing out the Mountain Dew so that a single 24-ounce bottle will last an entire week.
Isn’t college life grand?

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