I have spent the last five and a half years looking forward to this day. Today is my last day of school ever. After today, I will no longer have to sit through another lecture, study for another midterm or sacrifice a good night’s sleep to complete another 10-page research paper. After today, I will be an East Tennessee State University graduate.
I have looked forward to this day for a long, long time. However, it doesn’t feel quite how I had expected. Looking back on my time here at ETSU, I find myself with mixed emotions.
I am relieved. I no longer have to juggle my three part-time jobs and my full load of classes. I won’t have to miss out on any more girls’ nights out because I won’t have any schoolwork holding me back. I finally get to live like the many other twenty-something-year-olds I know, doing as I please for once in my life without any cares. I’ve looked forward to this relief for a long time.
I am proud. I actually did it. I am soon to be a college graduate. It took me a while but, despite adversity, I finally made it. I buckled down and completed my work. I studied when I needed to study and stayed at home writing when papers were due. I went to class. I did my extra credit. I am a soon-to-be college graduate and that is definitely something of which I should be proud.
I am content. Looking back over the last five years of my life, I see absolutely nothing I would change. I have a better idea of who I am and who I yearn to be. I have gained a sense of responsibility that could only be gained along the path I have taken. I have made irreplaceable, lifetime friends that have and will always continue to support me in whatever I choose to do. I have come to an understanding that who I am is a direct result of who I want to be. That in itself brings contentment.
I am anxious. My life so far has been a carefully thought out plan. Even after I took two semesters off, I pushed myself back on track and finished this step in my agenda. My so-called plan gets quite fuzzy after graduation. The next step is to get a “real job.” What does that mean? Am I capable of doing it? Will the opportunity present itself? Where do I begin my search? The butterflies in my stomach seem to fly as fast as these questions through my head. I have never been so anxious.
I am reminiscent. I have a lot of memories on this campus. I smoked my first cigarette while huddling under the awning at Lucille Clement Hall during a snowstorm. I got my first, second and third parking tickets right here on campus. I got my first own, personal column and, for the first time, became a recognizable member of an acclaimed newspaper staff.
I am grateful. I have been very lucky in my time here. I have had several professors teach me more than merely what was on the curriculum. Jack Mooney taught me that, as a journalist, I have a crucial role in society. Joyce Duncan reminded me that no matter how successful a person becomes, it is important to always act in a way that makes a positive impact on the community. Paul Tudico helped me discover my perpetual craving for philosophy and forced me to look at life objectively. Lise Cutshaw encouraged me to think outside the box and to follow my instinct.
Yes, I have spent the last five and a half years looking forward to this day. I have been counting down, semester by semester and week by week, until I could finally say goodbye to this campus. In retrospect, my only regret is that I didn’t take the time to enjoy each precious day as it unfolded. At least I can take with me each memory. During my stay at ETSU, I have learned more about myself and life in general than I had ever dreamed possible. For that, I will be forever indebted.

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