Damn that Michael Moore.
The Oscar wielding documentarian has stomped my dreams of becoming Tinkerbell – or at least dampened them somewhat.
Since I was about sixteen, I’ve had this idea that it would be swell to get a job with Disney as a character actor playing Tinkerbell at the theme parks.
I’m short, I have hips and I can scowl when necessary – the job might as well be mine.
The only thing in my way is a lack of blonde hair and, hey, that’s what the Florida sun’s for. I mean, heck, Tinkerbell doesn’t even talk so I could practically avoid the banter most characters deal with when in contact with tourists. To get paid to walk around all day and do very little of anything would be a dream job, right?
Apparently not according to Moore and his pre-2000 show “The Awful Truth.” Turns out Disney is not all kicks and giggles when it comes to their employees or at least not to the lowly folks who actually handle the public on a daily basis.
You know, the ones that sell the product and make the kids smile like they’ve died and gone to heaven (which I guess Disney is to a 5-year-old.)
Disney jobs are apparently on par with slave labor when it comes to the lower ranking positions. I don’t know the pay scale, but it’s probably not very high when you consider some of what the personnel has to deal with. In fact, a former Disney character actor interviewed on Moore’s show said that when he worked at the theme park, he had to live in his car because he was paid so poorly. That’s something to think about when you’re subjecting the poor souls to endless pictures with your screeching children.
Recruiters from Disney were at ETSU last week interviewing prospective employees and I almost went to the meeting. I had class at the time so I couldn’t, but the poster announcing the event got me thinking. Do people really know what they’re getting into when they apply for a job with one of the monsters of the business world?
My personal opinion is that some do and some don’t.
I think most students who end up in Orlando pushing brooms and selling $5 bottles of water knew what they were getting into. But I wonder about the people who end up in the full body costumes. Do they expect to get fired for vomiting or talking to guests out of character?
OK, in all honesty I don’t know for a fact that the actors get fired if they vomit, but I do know that they are strictly forbidden to remove their costume head in a public area. That makes sense, I admit. There’s no use in traumatizing children when Mickey Mouse turns out to be Joe Schmo. But is it fair to make Joe suffer the indignities of fainting or puking on himself?
It’s bad enough to do it normally, but can you imagine walking around with a puddle of vomit half an inch from your nose? I mean, I got queasy just writing that.
One of the most vivid memories I have of a trip I took to Disney in 1997 is Tigger high-tailing it to a backstage area. I knew immediately what was going on – the poor kid in the costume was about to blow chunks and couldn’t take the head off and do it out in the open. It was well into the 90s that day and I’m sure in the furry suit it had to be pushing 110 degrees, so I can understand the need. I felt so bad for the guy because as most people know, the need to vomit is not easy to contain.
I’m sure the actors get breaks and I’m sure they can go backstage to get water when they need it, but during the busy seasons at Disney, it must be near impossible to escape the crowds long enough to grab a sandwich or drink.
If they faint on the job, they’re expected to get some water and return to the public area immediately. Talk about hardcore. This is Disney I’m talking about, not boot camp.
The people who play look-alike characters (human Disney characters basically) don’t have to deal with as many hardships as other cast members, but they too are required to don furry costumes if the need is present.
Ah, to be scantily clad Jasmine one day and Minnie Mouse the next – what a life.
Maybe it’s more rewarding than it sounds.
I guess if you really love to make kids happy, it’s probably a wonderful job, but if you’re just out for the cash, probably not.
A nice job perk is free admission to the parks, but I guess after working there all week most people wouldn’t want to spend their free time perusing the Magic Kingdom or Epcot.
I haven’t completely given up my dream of becoming Tinkerbell.
Tinkerbell’s cute green outfit has me mesmerized, but I’m beginning to believe that it might be safer to work out of the limelight with a company like Disney.
I think it’s best to leave the bright lights of Disney acting to the trained professionals and I’ll just continue to enjoy the parks the way I always have – as an innocent bystander.
Author’s note:
If anyone out there has ever actually worked for Disney, as an actor or otherwise, and would like to give me some inside dish about the company and its practices towards employees, please write me at mohawktown@hotmail.com.
I’m really interested in learning about the Disney Empire from an insider’s perspective.

Author