I’ve been thinking about preconceived notions a lot lately. You know, don’t judge a book by its cover and all that jazz.
It’s not like there was one glaring incident that made me sit up and take notice, but a combination of events has made me more aware of how many covers I judge and how I am beginning to suspect my own cover is being perceived.
Sometime last semester, I found myself in a weird situation with a girl I don’t even know. I know her name (but will refrain from sharing) and I had a class with her, but as a person I have no knowledge of her beyond the surface or her cover, if you will. When I first came in contact with her, I sensed a vibe from her that gave me the impression I was not liked by this person. I felt, for the first time in a long time, someone was judging me in a negative way for no reason whatsoever.
Normally, I wouldn’t give a flying fig about if someone I don’t know likes me or not, but this time I was upset. Not cry my eyes out in private upset, but a deeper, why does she think she’s better than me upset.
Truth be told, to this day I don’t know her true feelings toward me. She very well might think I’m a cool person, or maybe she hates me. Maybe she doesn’t feel anything at all, maybe I’m not even a blip on her radar screen, but that’s not the point I’m getting to. My point is I spent almost an entire semester practically hating someone simply because I thought she hated me first.
Harsh – yes. Stupid – absolutely. Uncommon – I doubt it.
Not so much common for me, but for people in general. This is the event that sat me up, but it was not the first nor the last time I’ve found myself in an uncomfortable situation with someone simply because someone thought something baselessly.
I am not what you would call “normal” looking. No, I don’t have six arms or 17 fingers, but I do have 12 unnatural holes in my head (11 in my ears, one in my nose) and a couple of them aren’t exactly small.
These abnormalities have left me on the receiving end of some funky looks in my life and not all of them have been amused or friendly looks. A great many of them have been rude, angry and downright evil looks. My mother has, on numerous occasions, been close to yelling at folks for staring at me. To be honest, so have I.
I’ve never minded the smiles or shocked looks (because around here piercings aren’t that prevalent) but I always mind the looks that make me think if I could read minds all I’d hear is “That girl must be a dropout who does drugs and has diseases.”
Well, sure if I was 83 pounds with track marks I could see where that thought would come from, but seeing as I have a 3.5 GPA and have never so much as smoked pot, that basis is a little wonky.
It makes me sad that in this country, and hell, the world, people get judged by something so insignificant as their clothes or jewelry. I don’t assume every tall blonde with a nice body is a silicone-filled cheerleader, nor do I assume that every person who likes Dave Matthews is a hippie. There’s no reason behind it. We as a nation insist on tossing out the stereotypes and yet we don’t think twice about disregarding the metaphorical book because the cover doesn’t appeal to us.
It’s one thing with peers, it’s worse with authority.
I know a teacher, though like the girl from last semester I shall not name names, who I fear does not like me. To my immediate knowledge I have never insulted, berated, degraded or upset the person in reference. I simply go to class and do what needs doing, but I still feel like my appearance is unnerving to the teacher.
As I mentioned before, if I was a slacker with dark eye circles I could understand, but I’m good at what this person teaches, yet there is no warmth between us. It upsets me and I wish it wasn’t so, but the truth is, I don’t expect it to change. Those pesky preconceived notions like to ingrain themselves deep, and those suckers don’t like to go away.
I thought it funny that when I watched The Empire Strikes Back Wednesday something occurred to me for the first time.
Where would Luke be if he hadn’t bothered to get to know that annoying, food-locker raiding, backward-talking, little green guy in the Dagobah system?
Yeah, he’d still be whining in the swamp instead of being a Jedi.
Go figure how stupid some preconceived notions are.

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