Hey guess what? Not everyone is stuck in high school and I for one don’t give half a ‘frak’ about who gets elected Homecoming king and queen.
It is astounding to see so many people putting so much time into something that really only affects the groups directly involved. Homecoming court holds no bearing whatsoever on students not affiliated with one of the groups running.
“What is Homecoming? Homecoming means about as much to me as the bell tower. I would probably be more interested in reading about Paul Stanton’s weekly lunch schedule than the Homecoming results,” said Benjamin Farmer, a 20-year-old exercise science student.
Even now that we don’t have a football team and Homecoming is more silly than spirit inspiring, people continue to promote it. I can’t go anywhere on campus without seeing some stupid and poorly written slogan scribbled in chalk on the sidewalk.
Today alone, I saw five discarded scraps of paper that said something equivocal to ‘vote for vapid person A’ littering our campus. The ground is where those things ultimately end up once people have consumed the candy they are stapled to.
Annoyed about being stopped on my way to coffee, I asked a group of people passing the candy out what, exactly, Homecoming should mean to me and why I should bother to vote for anyone at all. I hoped that people directly promoting the colossal waste of time that is Homecoming could at least give me a half-hearted, “it promotes school spirit” or “it’s a way to get involved.” The response was somehow even less than I expected.
The group that day was made up of three girls and a guy all about my age. I don’t even recall what group they represented. As soon as I’d ask my question, all of the girls turned away and pretended to be busy doing something else. The young man left stared blankly at me for a moment and then simply conceded that it does not matter. It seems to me that these groups could put their time and money into something productive.
Philanthropy is a way for organizations to earn points for Homecoming, but it seems almost an afterthought. In an astounding waste of resources, the race for king and queen of nothing seems to be everyone’s main concern.

Author